A Formal Goodbye to SG

Wow, I never thought I would be doing this so soon, and I know this is like really out the blue, but I just felt that it needed to be done.  I thought everything would work out for us since this is really our last chance, but I guess not, and for the past few weeks I've been trying to convince myself that he might like me back, just trying to find proof.  In the end, I got nothing.  So now I must let this love interest go because boys just take too many of my emotions and it's just exhausting! And SG is too complicated for me to understand, as he has always been since the first day that I met him, and that's the only thing that I really wish I could change; I just wish that I could understand him.  Then again, he never has willingly given me a key to his emotions like he possibly might of to his girlfriends, and that only is a sign that our relationship wouldn't of worked anyway.  Shoot, I still have a lot of growing up to do when it comes to relationships because there is a lot of things that I have yet to experience and that is holding me back.
This year, I've dealt with my fair share of donkeys just like Donkey!  Donkey was a brotha that seemed so perfect, so intelligent, so respectful, so romantic, but in the end he was just playing me for a fool!  BGF and SG helped me feel better about this situation, and I think that was the reason I started to fall for him all over again.  My thinking was that this whole Donkey situation was a sign that SG and I were meant to be together, but again love, or strong like in this case, has knocked me down on my asset.

So today I declare that SG and I are going nowhere despite what I have written in the past, but I will keep those up because I love to look back at things like this to see how much I have grown.

This still is not ruling him out as a prom date.  And I think that my mom will make me take him anyway because she believes that it's best to have a prom date that is sort of like a friend, someone that you don't have to impress because they already love you for who you are.  In this case, I felt as if I had to impress SG because he doesn't believe that I can go that extra mile.  He doesn't think that I could be that girlfriend that's kissing my boyfriend, holding him, going out of my way to spend time with him, going out on dates etc. etc.  I've had one boyfriend since that time when SG and I's connection was so strong that I could tell that he wanted me as much as I wanted him, but we've grown up since then; we've had other's since then and as hard as it is to say, "maybe THIS just isn't our time".  Right now, I don't know if we're right for any of this lovey-dovey relationship stuff, but I have this strong feeling in my gut that won't go away, and this feeling has been haunting me ever since I realized that there ever was a possibility that we could be.  And this feeling is saying that we were meant to be together one way or another, maybe it's today, tomorrow, ten years from now, I can feel it.  As of now, I'm really considering asking my cousin, Mr. Revolution to prom.

Sigh. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 

                   Love,

                                    Blackness - PEACE!